We all seem to do it. Start a project, often with great enthusiasm, and then peter out within a relatively short time.

Join a gym, start a healthy eating program, begin to learn guitar – we jump in with both feet and our excitement is almost palpable for the first few days, even weeks.

Inevitably, though, we put off donning our sneakers, sneak a few unhealthy foods onto our dish, and ditch practice time one too many times.

Progress stalls and then we quit.

And the worst part is, we do it to ourselves.

We have this enemy within – the enemy of self-sabotage.

So why do we do it?

And more importantly, how can we stop doing it?

Fear of failure. Doubting our own abilities. Doubting our own worth. The thoughts that run through our conscious or subconscious mind are pretty much the same for all of us.

…what if it doesn’t work?
…what if I’m no good at this?
…what if I fail?
…what if I lose?

Self-sabotage is the voice of fear, really. And it can be really loud, whether we’re conscious of it or not.

So what can we do about it?

First, forget about getting rid of it. Self-doubt has been around since forever and you are never going to get rid of it. We are always going to doubt ourselves on some level. This is not always a bad thing. Questioning our choices can sometimes lead us to make better choices, which is good.

The real problem is not so much that we have this voice of fear inside of us, it’s that we’re giving it far too much of our attention and giving far too little attention to the other voices.

The voice of our dream. The voice of our ambition. The voice of our enthusiasm.

It’s as if we listen to the positive voices that get us started, and then silence them as soon as fear shows up. And I get it, fear is loud.

But the loudest voice isn’t necessarily the smartest voice.

And we do have a choice in what we allow ourselves to pay attention to. We can choose to focus on the fear, or we can choose – quite consciously – to focus on something else.

…you can definitely make it through this workout!
…you’re making progress – don’t stop!
…what if you win?
…what do you have to lose?

It is an act of self-will, choosing what we give our attention to.

We can choose to let fear drown out our more positive self-talk, or we can choose to direct our attention not to the loudest in the room, but to the most helpful.

Which might be more helpful.

~xo,
LuAnne